"It's March - well, technically the end of March or nearly so. That means that I am officially almost 3 whole months into trying to figure out The Plan. Honestly, it's not working so great. I know where I want to go, but the terrain looks like and Escher print. My role has changed. Some might think this is a midlife crisis type of moment, and maybe it is to a point. I'm 44. My children are both in their 20's. Raising them has ended. Homeschooling is over. It is time to focus on other things. The problem(s)? Well, they are many and varied. Quite a few of them are tied to past decisions that didn't quite work out as expected. I thought I would have a smoother transition into the role of Empty Nester than is happening. It's frustrating. I know how we got here. I'm just not sure how to get things moving in a positive direction again."
So starts a blog post that was never posted way back when. It's nearly July of 2021 now - and I'm 49 for those of you counting. Why the heck am I including this? Well, that's easy. It's still relevant in many ways here. Maybe it is where you are as well. The dream of becoming a successful author is not typically an overnight thing. We plod along, second guessing ourselves and wondering at our sanity level when it comes to the pursuit. Yet, we plod along. Why? Because we are writers. We can't help it. Maybe our blood cells look more like words than little flying saucers. Perhaps we're actually channeling stories from the great beyond that will not lie quiet until they are told. Most likely we are simply nucking futs with an overdeveloped sense of lunatic optimism. Whatever the cause, we HAVE TO write. There isn't a choice. The stories are in us and they need to get out if we have any hope of sleep. That would all be fine and dandy if it wasn't for the fact that writing in today's world doesn't mean scribbling out words and shoving them into a locked drawer. Oh no, we don't get off that easy. We need to PUBLISH! Our characters and plots absolutely need to see the light of day and find readers to love them in order to stop jumping around like a mental flea infestation. But wait! There's more! You don't just want to hand things over for free. I mean, that would mean that your time and effort is not only worthless (and that you are consequently the leach whose hobby keeps sucking at the bank account instead of turning into an actual income), but it would undercut the work of all the other writers you know and admire! Which means that no matter how you publish, you've also got to SELL. That means marketing plans, flaming hoops, the skills of a circus ringmaster, and the patience of a saint. You see how this thing that you love to do snowballs, right? Only it doesn't really snowball. Snowballs roll. This mess just avalanches straight down on your head in a large pile of numbing reality weighing down your efforts to - you know - write. But hey, maybe you're the winner of the golden ticket and just don't know it yet. Maybe that new little darling sitting in the notebook or word file is going to bring in a contract and sales that will let you retire to that private island with the helipad...or at least buy a replacement for your janky office chair. So you keep putting one word in front of the other until the story is done. Then you send it out into the world with the biggest hope filled balloon you can find. Because that's what it takes. All those writers who talk about sitting down at the keyboard and bleeding their story out onto the page don't mention how afterwards you are supposed to haul your anemic self out into the daylight, look appealing, and joyfully convince everyone you run across to spend their money on that piece of your soul squirming around on the paper. I, for one, say you're allowed to mourn the idea that you can't just write anymore. You can't sit in your pj's and sip wine while the royalties roll in. And if that mourning requires a fit now and then, I'm sure not going to judge. Heck, I'll rant right along with you.
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AuthorJosie Dorans Archives
June 2022
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